Divorce is a big decision that deserves careful consideration before you commit to it. However, thinking about it too hard, or for too long, can lead to analysis paralysis, making it even more difficult to commit to a course of action.
Because of its life-changing effects, it is natural to feel a little scared about divorce and wonder if you are doing the right thing. Family Education suggests some things to consider before you commit to your divorce.
Any big decision involving both you and your spouse requires open communication, and divorce is no exception. Even if the marriage eventually ends in divorce, you still have a responsibility to show respect for your spouse. This means being frank about the reasons you are unhappy and listening to him or her in return.
Have the conversation in therapy
Getting the perspective of a mental health professional who has no investment in your relationship but has training and experience in helping people work out problems can help to de-escalate the emotional reactions that are likely to arise and make the conversation more productive. You may not reach an understanding that saves your marriage, but you should come away with a better appreciation of your spouse’s point of view and greater clarity about your options.
Be open to change
Before you make your final decision, both you and your spouse should consider whether the relationship would be salvageable if something were different. If so, you should discuss the changes that you think might help and see if you can come up with a workable solution before you go ahead with filing.
Only when you believe you have done everything you could to save the marriage should you consider divorce. This can prevent you from having second thoughts later on.